Page 9 - Southern Exposure - April '21
P. 9

Southern Exposure, Page 9


                                             The Singles Scene Column                                            ©

                                         LOVE AFTER LOCKDOWN SPECIAL EDITION

                                                       Pearls of Wisdom from THE Florida Matchmaker
                                                           By Kelly Leary, M.S., Founder of Revolution Dating

        ♥ Practice kindness. There                        ♥  T.M.E.  Facts: Dating is an investment of Time,     ♥ Online dating is a risky roll of the dice. You could
      is nothing that’s a bigger                        Money, and Emotion. Any date is an investment of all   lose your time, money, and soul (T.M.E.) in the same way
      turnoff than when a person                        three. With our pre-screening of members, relationships   people lose themselves in Las Vegas! Stay too long, and
      comes into the gate – or a date,                  move along quicker and tend to be a better investment of   you may never come back.
      or a room, or a party – with                      TME at Revolution Dating.                            ♥  Always maintain an attitude of gratitude. This
      a bad attitude. If you don’t                        ♥ Inner beauty trumps exterior beauty every day   applies to your love life and far beyond.
      practice kindness in life, love,                  of the week. Looks don’t mean a thing when it comes to     ♥  80/20.  If your relationship/date is 80% good and
      work and play, you will reap                      success in date-land. Exterior beauty might get you in the   20% questionable, give it the green light and continue.
      what you sow.                                     door, but can you get a second date? Inner beauty rules.  Otherwise, it’s time to do some serious soul searching. Is
        ♥  First impressions                              ♥ Believe in yourself. If you don’t, no one else will…  this the right fit for you?
      matter. I’ve learned that your                    including your date!                                 ♥  50:50.  This is about talking, not paying the tab!
      impression of a person is                           ♥ If you are striking out, look in the mirror and soul   While dating, keep an eye on your conversation and your
      usually formed in the first 60 seconds! So make sure that   search. Are you doing everything you can to find love? Or   listening skills. Take turns. Your conversation should be
      your “hello” is a good one.                       are you expecting your matchmaker to deliver love to your   shared equally. If someone is doing 90% of the talking,
        ♥ Love over 65 is easier than you think! I am not even   doorstep like a pizza? Matchmaking is a collaboration.   there is a problem.
      intimidated by aging anymore, as I watch my clients have   Connect, bond, show your good side, listen to feedback,     ♥ When you break up, do it with class. Don’t break
      fun well into their 80s. Age is just a number and romance   give feedback, cooperate and be open to advice. If you go   up through an email or text. Be forthright but humble.
      happens at all ages. I see it every day.          to your doctor and don’t listen to one word of his advice,     ♥ Grieving is tough, and everyone has their own
        ♥ Don’t delay real romance in your 30s. Don’t wait until   fail to take your medicine, and remain sick, is it your   timeline. You will know when you are ready to get back
      you’re 37 or 38 to get serious about your search for a life-long   doctor’s fault? No.               in the game. In this day and age, seniors are dating after
      partner. Women shouldn’t do this for obvious reasons, but     ♥ Don’t be too picky. I have a female client who won’t   the loss of a spouse, and they are finding love again. But
      men shouldn’t either. When men wait too long to start the   date a man under 6’4”, literally. He has to be a tri-athlete,   always avoid comparisons. You are looking for someone
      process, I have noticed they become too picky, jaded, and   has a high net worth, and must have blue eyes! If your   new who will be a good companion in the here and now.
      can be labeled negatively.                        criteria are this strict, be prepared to wait quite a bit longer     ♥  Cowards never start, winners never quit, and
        ♥ Love begets love. We have a rule in our office: “Only   than someone who is more open-minded. High standards   quitters never win. Don’t ever quit on love. Remember,
      Love is Spoken Here!” Go on a date with this in mind and I   are fine, as long as you know that the other person has to   fear is the opposite of love.
      guarantee you will probably get a second one!     like YOU back! Be realistic and self-aware. (Example:     ♥ Join a love movement just for YOU. Stand up for
        ♥ You can buy love (sort of). Dates, dinners, gifts, cards,   avoid requesting a Blake Shelton look alike if you are not   something that you want in your life moving forward. Be
      flowers, vacations, rings, weddings…there is no avoiding   a Gwen Stefani look-alike--this has actually happened to   part of your own solution, not your own problem. Get
      the “cost” of dating. A man may splurge for the first few   me.)                                     out of your own way, in other words, when it comes to
      dates, and a woman may get her hair done and buy a few     ♥ Men bear the brunt of dating. So ladies, don’t abuse   romance.
      new outfits and a new shade of lipstick. If you don’t invest,   this and use them for a free meal! Always be courteous
      you won’t progress.                               and say thank you!                                 Dating on page 10
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