Page 17 - Boca ViewPointe - October '22

Page 16, Viewpointe October 2022
Holiday Confusion...What To Do!

By Josette Veltri feelings. Pause and challenge the feeling asking what did I The Four Agreements are:
learn and, how can I use what was learned to create feelings Be Impeccable With Your Word
According to some I want to feel this holiday? Don’t Take Anything Personally
re se a rc he rs, hol i da y 3. Be gentle with yourself. If a loss is experienced during Don’t Make Assumptions
confusion can be avoided the holidays, pause often to process your grief with love, Always Do Your Best
by focusing on the value understanding and self-compassion. You may have to say NO 5. Open your heart to love and forgive. “Nobody cares
of family. And, although I THANK YOU and not let other people’s opinions matter or how much you know, until they know how much you care.”
agree, I believe there are add to your holiday confusion. Loss tends to redefine what (Theodore Roosevelt)
more coping strategies that is important to us whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a pet, I’m not sure why change and transitions seem to show
will help avoid overwhelm a job loss, a diagnosis, a relocation and more. up more during the holidays but I am sure we can think of a
and stop holiday confusion. If or when you experience a loss during this holiday, know million reasons why. However, what I know with certainty
The following are five simple but powerful practices to that it is normal to feel inner turbulence, think unclearly, is when change and transitions show up, so does the pink
consider: and act distracted. Take time to re-balance your mind, body, elephants in the room we see BUT choose to ignore.
1. Before your thoughts bring you to overwhelm, STOP and spirit by placing your hands over your heart, taking a 2022 holidays are right around the corner. Will we choose
thinking and start doodling. Do you mean doodling as deep breath and allow yourself to process the loss with love, one, two or more practices knowing peace and joy will
in scribbling? Yes doodling as in scribbling, thoughtless understanding, and self-compassion. follow or will we choose to do the same things over and over
absentminded gesture to relax your brain. Doodling also 4. Drop the assumptions. In his book The Four expecting different results?
known as “spontaneous drawing” is a form of art that Agreements, don Miguel Ruiz reminds us that everything we
helps redirect your focus and relieve stress. So why is do is based on agreements with ourselves, with other people, For more information on learning and applying
doodling so effective? Research shows the common reason family, friends, with God, with life. And, the most important coping strategies, contact Josette Veltri at josette@
is the rhythmic motion of drawing activates the relaxation agreement of all is the one YOU make with yourself. nextstepnewstart.com. 
response, decreasing cortisol, the stress hormone.
2. Be mindful of the HOLIDAY ENERGY coming from
TV ads shouting what, when, where, why, and how to spend
the holidays.
Be prepared to ask clarifying questions after being
bombarded with holiday ads of dos and don’ts, whens, and
wheres. For example, after watching Commercial A you
sense a feeling of guilt. Pause and challenge the feeling by
asking what was it that I did not do in the past or should
be doing now? After watching Commercial B you feel sad
and begin searching for memories in the past to justify your